Horse Manure Park

It is the last day of 2016. Thank you for "tuning in" to read my posts; it is a rare event when something new pops up here (and I really must change that). If I was a true believer in resolutions, I would resolve to write more. But my cynical side tells me I am setting myself up for failure. The excuses will fly left and right why I don't post more often. Instead, I will write today -- mark time as the year ends -- and see what tomorrow brings. The past year was very memorable, but for mostly the wrong reasons. So many famous people in the entertainment industry died this year and I've taken a few minutes to compile a list (certainly not exhaustive): David Bowie Alan Rickman Dan Haggerty  Glenn Frey Abe Vigoda Maurice White  Harper Lee (author of To Kill a Mockingbird ) Sir George Martin  Frank Sinatra, Jr. Garry Shandling  Patty Duke Merle Haggard Prince Morley Safer Elie Wiesel (author of Night ) Garry Mashall Gene Wilder Bobby Vee Kay Sta...

So it is New Year's Day.  Today is the day we make our resolutions and vow "big changes" for the new year to come. How stupid. What makes us think that just because the calendar reveals it's the first day of the first month of a brand new year, that we magically become different in our resolve? Based on a non-scientific study, 99.7% of the "big changes" we resolve to make flounder within 14 days of the new year.  This especially includes going to the gym and starting a diet. Simply put, Americans are all talk and no action.  Making a plan, taking action and sticking to the plan  is difficult .   And we don't do difficult .  If it doesn't come in a pill or offer instant gratification, we are not interested.  We quit easily. As the great poet and songwriter Paul Simon once philosophized in the year I was born, "After changes upon changes we are more or less the same." So, you'll see no resolutions here.  I don't believe...

Okay, I've put on my big boy pants. Why do I do this to myself? And I've found 1,000 reasons to hate myself.  I started this beast on January 5.  I'm the only one in the house who even has interest in it.  What started as a family activity is now "alone time." Oh well. I hope you've started the new year off right, but most likely by now everyone's resolutions are starting to fizzle. You can't find time to do _____ because your _____  always ______. You can't _____ because you're too ______.  [fill in blanks with excuses -- and if you live in my part of the country, this brutal cold snap would give you ample excuse to break any and all promises to yourself] But that's okay.  With any luck, you'll have next year to start fail all over again.  (This cynical attitude is labeled "Negativity" by the Wife.  I call it "Realism."  As you can plainly see, I'm a righteous bastard to live with... at least...

I've heard it said that people look forward to the new year as a new start on old habits.  That pretty much sums up the notorious "New Year's Resolution." When the calendar says January 1st, we are programmed to think our old habits, alive and well on December 31st, will magically disappear into the ether at midnight.  We believe we will suddenly turn everything around and become thinner, healthier, smarter... And for some reason, we really believe it will happen .  Funnier still, we get fooled every single year... for about six days.  Then we fall right back to the old routine.  Indeed, a new start to old habits. So as 2013 fades into history, what does the new year hold in store for us? If we're lucky, another 365 days. Time to keep it real. What are my realistic resolutions for the new year? I resolve to... 1. Start washing my hands almost every time after I go to the bathroom. 2. Stop using the word f**k as a verb/adjective/noun in e...

It's my first entry of 2012.  So much for resolving to update my blog more often in the new year.  Nine days later, I'm finally getting around to it.  It was an exciting football weekend here in the Branstner household.  Instead of repeating myself, I'll just redirect you here to Snot Bubble Football , my "other" blog, and to read about the excitement of the Bison winning their first FCS national title.  Meanwhile, our house has been full of germs and sickness, which has been an ongoing theme since Thanksgiving.  It's really getting old, I can assure you. Both kids had pink eye early last week.  Neil got it first, then Ava (and it didn't come from school - Ava was still on Christmas break, so we don't know where in the world this came from).  I took both kids to the MD on the 4th and the eye drops they were prescribed quickly cleared up the infection. And right on cue, Neil came down with a doozy of a cold.  Again .  He went into...

Happy New Year to one and all!  We didn't do much last night - had a little party here with homemade masks and sparkling grape juice.  It was pretty cute, although I was my typical tired and crabby self - as my wife made me acutely aware.  I was asleep by 9:00 PM.  I've logged a lot of hours at work over the past three weeks and I have to admit that it caught up with me.  I missed the big countdown to midnight, but man did it feel good to sleep!  So we say goodbye to 2010 and hello to 2011.  Without a doubt the biggest highlight for my blog in 2010 was when Brian Ray left a a comment back in May ( you can see it right here ).  He's a multi-instrumentalist in Paul McCartney's band, former musical director for Etta James' band and a terrific musician/singer/songwriter in his own right.  It was pretty damn cool of him to say a little something on my blog.  Talk about keeping it real for his fans! I don't think I reached any goals in 201...

It is the New Year.  I will borrow a line from my dear ol' dad -- This year my resolution is to stop riding motorcycles.

I can already tell 2009 is going to be different. Last night marked a watershed occasion: I was asleep before 9 p.m. This was the first time in my adult memory that I did not stay up to usher in the New Year. I had two beers (one for me and one for Beth, of course) and the cold beverages had a sedative effect on me. I was out like a light and didn't open my eyes until 6:30 a.m., when I awoke feeling totally refreshed, rejuvenated and ready to take on the world ... ...okay, I'm getting a little carried away. But I did wake up feeling well-rested. So I got up, brewed a pot of coffee and went out to the garage to puff on an Iguana and think about the New Year (it was 16 degrees this morning, which felt balmy compared to yesterday!). I read Stacy's blog yesterday about God making all things new and I thought about how my New Year is going to be different. I decided this will be a year of anticipation. The biggest anticipated event by far , of course, will be the birth o...