Horse Manure Park

What a night! Ava was up at 1:30 AM puking her guts out, and she spewed every 10 to 15 minutes until about 5:00 AM. This was explosive, projectile, no-warning-until-it's-flying-out-of-the-pie-hole kind of hurling. I got puked on twice, Beth got puked on once. There was puke all over the floor -- it was enough to make you puke. I made Beth go to bed around 3:30 AM (hey, I'm not the pregnant one here, she needs her rest!) and I stayed up with Ava until 8:30 AM. Took a power nap until Beth had to go to work. It's about 1:30 in the afternoon now and Ava hasn't thrown up for about three hours, so it's slowed down a bit. She was able to keep some 7 -Up down. She'd never had pop before, but drank about 1/4 of a glass and asked for more. I told her maybe later. So far, so good. Not sure what is wrong, she's not running a fever, just blowing chunks. Poor kid. I hope it's just a quick flu bug. Beth is working until 7:30 tonight. We'll all be read...

It's time to be honest with myself, my friends and my family. I have a confession to make. I hope you'll forgive me for this. Please understand this is a disease and I can't control myself. I need your help and support. I don't need your scorn and ridicule. I love Hamburger Helper! I LOVE IT, I LOVE IT, I LOOOOOOVE IT!!!! I just wanted to share that with you all. Please don't judge me.

Overheard in the Branstner household today: "Papa, are you going potty?" "Yes, sweetie, I'm going potty." "Good job! You're a big girl now." "Thanks, Ava."

I sat down tonight and thought it would be kind of fun to watch some high school basketball, since the Minnesota state tournament is going on right now. I have to admit I ended up changing the channel after about 20 minutes. You see, at some point in the last couple of decades, basketball stopped becoming a team sport. What I saw tonight was a bunch of selfish, three-point shooting showboats, with no concept of teamwork, no respect for the game, no respect for their opponents and certainly no respect for the officials. It was absolutely disgusting and I sure won't waste my time watching the remainder of the tournament this weekend. The old saying is true: You reap what you sow. And the prevailing "winning is everything" attitude which these kids have been raised on has sown a whole lot of crap.

...okay, not really. Ish, that would be gross. It's about time I update things. It is pouring rain (but not men). I've heard this crap is supposed to turn into snow during the night and leave a big mess by tomorrow morning. Bring it on. I'm used to it. Come on Old Man Winter! Is this all ya got? Ya big pussy. We've had a busy few days. Our good friends Korey and Shelli became grandparents again late last week. Scott and Sammi are proud new parents of a bouncing baby girl. A drink is called for, but the challenge is finding an opportunity to drink it together. We also had a long overdue dinner and visit with the Stokes's on Sunday. Jon grilled brats and burgers -- aaahh, spring time! -- and we had a nice long visit. How overdue was it? I finally gave Jon his birthday present. His birthday was November 22nd. So we kind of lucked out over the past few days. Spaghetti at the Dau's Friday, grilling at the Stokes's Sunday. (In these hard economi...

We got our taxes done yesterday, then went over to Grandma and Grandpa's for a delicious spaghetti supper. Now, Grandma and Grandpa have all kinds of toys for the grandkids and one of Ava's favorites is a collection of plastic cows, calves and bulls. She will sit for hours playing with the plastic animals and have a grand ol' time. These animals are very sturdy pieces of plastic and are, shall we say, highly detailed replicas. The bull in particular features a very pronounced pair of testicles on his underside and sure enough, after playing for a while, my curious three year-old began studying this interesting characteristic between the bull's legs. Before I knew it, Ava thrust the bull's hanging nut-sack in my face and innocently asked, "Papa, what's that her name?" And there I sat at my in-law's home trying to watch basketball with a plastic bull's scrotum sitting under my nose while thinking of something clever to say to scare my daugh...

The snow has been doing a peculiar thing lately. The last few days have been what they call "above freezing," a strange and magical occurrence in which frozen things become unfrozen. The snow has been slowly turning into an anomalous and unfamiliar liquid state, called "water," which seems to be evaporating into the atmosphere or soaking into the ground. We seem to be transitioning into a different chapter and I am concerned. I am told it is the arrival of a new and exotic setting, which, oddly enough, is called "Spring." It is a frightening time of year when the air becomes un-cold, vegetation comes alive and insects emerge from their secret hiding place to once again crawl the face of the earth. I suspect the root cause of this disparity is attributed to Earth being tilted on its axis at a 23.5 degree angle. As Earth revolves, our north pole tilts more toward the sun which causes an increase in solar radiation, thus causing an increase in environmen...

This was the first St. Paddy's day I've had off in years, so I was determined to have a green beer today. I am finally enjoying one now. I'm alone in my living room, updating my blog and drinking a green beer. The rest of the house is sound asleep. Does that make me a party animal or what? Oh, and I imbibed in an Iguana in the garage a little while ago. There's an Irish connection there, too. Iguana's were JFK's favorite cigar. JFK was Irish. And Iguana's are, by the way, green. I am so totally Irish today. As you can tell from my last blog, I really enjoyed the Eagles concert. They are masters of their craft and it was just a joy to hear live music performed that well. Now that the concert is in the books, life has returned to normal. Our next excitement will come around July 18th when we finally get to meet our new tax deduction. That is only four months away. It boggles my mind how fast time has gone with this pregnancy. It seemed like it to...

Just got back from a very pleasant stay in Fargo. For my money, Eagles not only met, but exceeded my expectations Sunday night. What a remarkable band. Here’s my “official” review of the show… The houselights went down at about 8:15 p.m. and the band took the simply designed stage: risers in back, a giant semi-circle screen behind the stage and flanked with two large HD screens to the left and right. Nothing fancy, but they didn’t need to distract their audience with smoke and mirrors. It was all about the music. It was immediately evident that the Eagles had no intention in resting on their laurels. They could have stuck with their many classic hits from their golden era of the ‘70’s, but not this band. They opened the show with “How Long,” the first single from their new album, Long Road Out of Eden , and they sounded absolutely fantastic. I knew right away it was going to be a great night. “How Long” was immediately chased by the second single off Long Road Out of Eden , “B...

TWO DAYS AND COUNTING!! "I read in Life magazine about free love and free dope in California. So, naturally, I drove to Los Angeles." --Glenn Frey "Except for a few guitar chords, everything I've ever learned in my life of any value came from women." --Glenn Frey "I won't apologize for our ticket prices. I think we're well worth it. We consider ourselves among the elite touring acts, like the Stones, Elton John and Paul McCartney." -- Glenn Frey "Hey, I didn't make a big deal out of Hotel California . The 18 million people that bought it did, however." --Glenn Frey "Don's the philosopher of the band. He's the voice and the poet. I'm the brains." --Glenn Frey "Sometimes you get the best light from a burning bridge." --Don Henley "Selling eight million copies of your first album will mess you up." --Don Henley "A man with a briefcase can steal millions more than any man wi...

Note the date: March 12. Note the temperature this morning: -25 degrees Fahrenheit That's just wrong. And that's all I've got to say about that. Stupid winter.

Congratulations to the North Dakota State Men's Basketball Team! They have advanced to the NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament (a.k.a. "The Big Dance") in their first year of division 1 eligibility. This is only the second time in collegiate history a school has advanced to the national tournament in their first year of eligibility. It will be fun to watch them play. Unfortunately they will probably have to play one of the Goliaths, such as North Carolina or Pittsburgh -- but anything can happen once the teams take the court. That's why I love March Madness!

You can describe patience in many ways, but pictures tell a thousand words: Ava with her favorite playmate, Grace the boxer. Grace, who has more patience than a saint, doesn't seem to mind this picture. But here I think the expression on Grace's face says it all: "This picture taking has grown tiresome. I feel exploited. Please help me." (Oh, cute kid too! )

The countdown has begun to the Eagles concert Sunday night in Fargo! A bunch of us (Beth’s family and my family) are converging on the Fargodome and we’re going to have a great time! Just for fun, I’ve been doing a little research on the Eagles as a band and they have a very colorful past. Here are some interesting facts, written in my own words (not just copied from some article): The Eagles have won six Grammy Awards spanning a 34 year time period. They are members of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, Vocal Group Hall of Fame, and have been honored by the Recording Industry of America for the “Best Selling Album of the Century.” Glenn Frey was born on November 6, 1948 in Detroit, Michigan. He moved to California in 1968 where met and was hired by Bob Seger. Frey soon met and became roommates with Jackson Browne and the two remain good friends to this day. Don Henley was born July 22, 1947 in Gilmer, Texas. He moved to California in 1970 to record an album with his band, Shiloh. T...

...the first "official" picture of the newest addition to the Branstner clan! We had our first detailed ultrasound today and everything checked out just fine. The sonographer got some good pictures. In fact, this one even looks like a little person, rather than the "Alien Monster From Hell" views you usually get with these things. So what do you think, does it look like a boy or a girl? I'm placing $100 she's a girl (I must emphasize, though, we do not know!). Just had to share the joy from a proud dad!

Beth got an unexpected day off today (she got to stay home due to low census at the hospital), so we all got to spend the day together, which usually only happens every other Saturday and Sunday. We took advantage of the day and got Ava's new room rearranged so she can move in when the baby arrives. Yeah, it's still just March, but July will be here so quickly that I know we won't be ready. We've (slowly) learned to do things now rather than say, "that's something we should do one of these days." "One of these days" always seems to be tomorrow until it becomes today and you suddenly don't have done what you meant to do. I'm not sure if that made sense? Oh well, I knew what I meant. I think. Beth has joined Facebook, so you'll have to pardon me if my blogging slows down a bit. She is now on the computer more than I am. In fact, I had to wait for her to go to bed tonight before I even dared to approach the keyboard. Maybe I ...

My wife told me about this song last night and she said it made her cry -- and I can understand why. I had never heard this song until tonight and I was blown away. It is a remarkably beautiful song -- the lyrics are amazing. Just a quick background for those who don't know, Dave Matthews (the guy who is singing) had a sister who was murdered in 1994. I believe this song was written in her memory. Dave Matthews hasn't released anything new for quite some time, but if he's got songs like this written, it's a shame he doesn't record them. For those of you who have a sister, this song says just about everything you could ever want to say.

I was sad to hear Paul Harvey died yesterday, February 28th. Interestingly, he died exactly 12 years to the day after my dad passed away. Harvey was an icon in American culture. As far as I'm concerned, he was a legend. Recipient of the Presidential Medal of Freedom four years ago, Harvey's career spanned 75 years, but he first received national acclaim in 1951 when his program, "Paul Harvey News and Commentary" debuted. Harvey cut back to part time in May 2008 at the age of 89, after 57 years of daily broadcasts and as the show's only writer. Remarkable. I remember my parents listening to him every day and they always got a chuckle out of his insights, wit and wisdom. He was one of those rare breeds who had the gift of saying things just so, never offending anyone, but always getting his point across -- in most cases, quite powerfully. "The Rest of the Story," a short program in which Harvey would talk about the story behind a famous event or pe...