Shingles, Fishing and "Up North"
Let the shingling begin. My roof is being torn off as I write this. These guys are moving fast.
I stopped by city hall yesterday morning and was raped for $70 for my little piece of paper that said it was okay to put new shingles on my house. Ridiculous. To make matters worse, the building inspector was a pompous bastard. But I guess when you get to call the shots and no one can challenge your authority, you can be King Shit of Turd Mountain.
Pardon my French.
So another working weekend is upon us. We get a nice little double whammy this time around -- not only is there a full moon on Saturday, but it's also fishing opener at 12:01 AM Saturday morning. Oh, such lucky health care workers we are. The hard core fishermen are fine, because they are here for all the right reasons. It's all the yahoos who file up in their Escalades and Land Rovers from the bowels of the suburbs and pretend to be outdoorsmen for the weekend. They drink too much and forget the laws of gravity and physics still apply "up north" at "the cabin."
By the way, I'd like to once again offer KARE 11 from the Twin Cities my annual "Piss Up A Rope" award for their "Cabin Cast" for the Brainerd Lakes Area, as featured every Thursday and Friday, complete with twanging banjos. I've written meteorologist Belinda Jensen about this, voicing my displeasure at KARE 11's condescending attitude towards anyone north of Elk River.
I stopped by city hall yesterday morning and was raped for $70 for my little piece of paper that said it was okay to put new shingles on my house. Ridiculous. To make matters worse, the building inspector was a pompous bastard. But I guess when you get to call the shots and no one can challenge your authority, you can be King Shit of Turd Mountain.
So another working weekend is upon us. We get a nice little double whammy this time around -- not only is there a full moon on Saturday, but it's also fishing opener at 12:01 AM Saturday morning. Oh, such lucky health care workers we are. The hard core fishermen are fine, because they are here for all the right reasons. It's all the yahoos who file up in their Escalades and Land Rovers from the bowels of the suburbs and pretend to be outdoorsmen for the weekend. They drink too much and forget the laws of gravity and physics still apply "up north" at "the cabin."
By the way, I'd like to once again offer KARE 11 from the Twin Cities my annual "Piss Up A Rope" award for their "Cabin Cast" for the Brainerd Lakes Area, as featured every Thursday and Friday, complete with twanging banjos. I've written meteorologist Belinda Jensen about this, voicing my displeasure at KARE 11's condescending attitude towards anyone north of Elk River.
Dear Ms. Jensen:
Not all of us "up north" have three teeth and wear bib overalls (lots do, but not everyone). I actually graduated from an accredited Big Ten university with a genuine bachelor's degree. Believe it or not, but we simpletons "up north" do have electricity these days. And internet. And cell phones. Some day soon we'll have paved streets and running water, I'm sure of it.
By the way, Brainerd/Baxter is located near the geograhical center of Minnesota. We are as "up north" as St. Cloud is "down south."
As Ozzy Osbourne says at the beginning of every show, "Let the madness begin!"
