Horse Manure Park

It's a blue moon on New Year's Eve. Wonder how many times that has happened? I suppose once in a blue moon. Happy New Year to everyone.  Goin' to work now.

As you can see, Farm Fest 2010 now has a date.  We tossed a few dates around and the third weekend in August is what worked out best for the "band."  Hopefully we have the date set far enough in advance so people can get it on their calendars and get vacation requested. Gosh, the warm days of summer, camping and Farm Fest seem like a long way off right now.  Christmas is over and now we begin the "rut," as I call it -- the period of time between late December and late March. That's a long rut. It sounds like Friday through Monday we are going into the deep freeze around here, with lows around -20 each night.  At least that's what I heard on the radio on my way home from work this morning.  Actually, -20 is colder than a deep freeze. That's just stupid. The end of the year is tomorrow.  Over the past year I have had over 5,300 hits on my blog.   That's pretty cool.  It certainly gives me incentive to keep on writing.  Thanks for reading my

We're back from our Christmas adventure.  The trip down to Waseca took some time and was a little hairy in places, especially between the Cities and Owatonna where the roads were covered in snow in places and it was difficult to tell what was where, but people were driving (surprisingly) slow and using (surprising) caution, so we got there slowly but safely. We had a fun time with the family and set off back home around 11:30 AM today.  It was a much less stressful drive home, the roads were in perfect condition and we arrived to a driveway full of about a foot of snow.  Of course, I promptly got the car stuck halfway into the driveway.  It was nothing a little shoveling couldn't take care of, but I'm blaming it on the tires.  Beth said I shouldn't have stopped.  I say I stopped because my shitty tires started spinning.  She got mad, got out of the car and said, "I'm walking home."  Luckily she only had to walk 15 feet. So after I got the car unstuck

Merry Christmas to all!  We have our Christmas cards ready to send to everyone, but stamps seem to be an essential part of sending a letter.  Due to lack of stamps in our household, I'm afraid your card is going to be late, but it's the thought that counts, right? We are scrambling here to get our stuff organized and packed.  We are going to take off tomorrow night, heading for Waseca, MN, which is where Beth's oldest sister lives.  We are in a race against Mother Nature.  There is a major winter storm a-comin' and it ain't looking good.  At least 14 inches of snow is expected for our area, starting late Wednesday night.  We are going to cut it close and we've got a long drive -- a little over 200 miles or so.  Racing a blizzard -- I think only Minnesotans would even try to do this.  Are we brave or just stupid? By the way, that's a rhetorical question. If the forecast is correct ( a huge IF ), we will beat the storm if (a huge IF ) we leave soon

I have been cold medicine-free for the last 12 hours and I am feeling a little more human.  I was alternating Nyquil, Robitussin, hot buttered rum, Dayquil, Sudafed, crack-cocaine, shots of brandy and Russian tea and it really made me feel weird - like a Jim Morrison "Lizard King" type of weird.  I thought everything was fine, but when the Christmas stockings started talking to me I decided enough was enough.  No more cold medicine.  I started detoxing myself from all of this stuff that was supposed to be making me feel "better" and I think my body is finally coming around, judging by the green, chewy leeches I am hacking out of my lungs.  (Sorry, too much information.) I still do not feel 100%, but certainly better than yesterday.  My sore throat is gone, but I woke up with a pounding headache and I haven't been able to get rid of it.  I'm not sure if it is my sinuses or the fact that I haven't had any coffee for the last couple of days.   It's

A doozy of a cold has knocked me out for the count.  I felt poor earlier this week, went to work on Tuesday and started really feeling cruddy.  Now I'm just plain sick.  Sore throat, fever, coughing, sneezing -- pretty classic and crappy stuff. My wife is trying to nurse me back to health.  She made me Russian tea today, like her grandma used to make.  I live in a cave and have never heard of Russian tea, but it is pretty darn good.  This stuff is made with Tang, the same orange drink that I used to enjoy when I was a kid.  But Tang doesn't look like this anymore; nor does it come in a glass jar with a metal lid: Now it comes in just a plain, boring orange plastic container, and plastered across the label are the words:  "New BETTER Taste!"  I just don't understand this type of marketing.  This year Tang celebrated its 50th anniversary.  Why, after 50 years, do they need to be concerned about making it taste better? Maybe I'm just sick and crabby.

We got our Christmas pictures today, which I think turned out pretty cute.  My wife is pushing me to write my usual Christmas letter, but I can't find the motivation or time to sit down and git 'er done this year.  The way I look at it, my Christmas letter will go to the people who read my blog and the people who read my blog are already up-to-date with our life, so it makes it rather redundant and anti-climactic if ya ask me. Everyone at our house is sick and Neil especially sounds bad.  He is very "croupy" sounding and he'll bear watching closely.  There's nothing more stressful than sick children. There's only ten more days till Christmas.  We'll be heading to Waseca to spend the holidays with Beth's family... that is, provided we are all healthy by then! I am watching Turner Movie Classics (one of my favorite channels) and they are airing the original, uncut version of "Gone With The Wind," complete with overture, intermission

I have been listening to a lot of Louis Jordan and His Tympany Five lately. Without a doubt, most of you just asked in unison, " Who ?" It doesn't surprise me that most people have never heard of Louis Jordan, but I think it is a crime that he is not as well known as the thousands of artists he has influenced over the past 65 years.  My goal is to change that in my own little way by giving my blog readers a little music history lesson.  (And if you don't like music or history, then I really don't know what the hell is wrong with you.)  Who knows, maybe after reading this you'll be inspired to check out this fantastic and incredibly influential musician. (I should add that the following was written by me , using various sources from the internet... it wasn't just copied from some web site.  That would be pretty lame.) Louis Jordan was a band leader, lead vocalist and saxophone virtuoso, whose popularity grew in the early 1940s, where he proved

"I will be taking an indefinite break from professional golf. My pecker seems to be getting in the way of everything."

I woke up this morning and what did I see... Not much mercury staring back at me. -14* F Welcome to winter in Minnesota! YES!!!!!!!

I posted this on my Facebook page, but it is worth pondering here... John Lennon was murdered 29 years ago tonight in New York City.  On this night, I am the same age as Lennon was the night he died.  He turned 40 on October 9th, 1980 and died December 8th at the age of 40 years, 55 days.  I turned 40 years old on October 8th and I am 40 years and 56 days old tonight, December 8th. Weird.  And a little disturbing. The world lost one of the greatest musicians of all time that night because of one horribly disturbed individual.  As Elton John said, "It's funny how one insect can damage so much grain." Here is the most powerful song ever written by Elton John, in memory of his friend, John Lennon, who was taken from us far too soon on this night in 1980.  

Without going into details... If you are collecting disability benefits and you are admitted to an ICU because you are high on meth, hallucinating and a danger to yourself and others -- shouldn't your eligibility for collecting disability be immediately revoked? It really pisses me off that you and I are paying for someone else's meth habit. It should really piss you off too.

Is the weekend over yet? Blah. It's cold and we now have a dusting of snow.  It feels like winter and sort of resembles it, too. How many days till Spring?

Hello, Bloggerland... I am back.  Happy December 1st.  Only 24 more shopping days 'till Christmas! I am still trying to catch up on my e-mails.  I haven't been around a computer much over the past week.  My laptop suffered a massive epileptic seizure the day before Thanksgiving.  It totally crashed and burned.  I entrusted it into the capable hands of James at Brainerd Computers on Monday and he diagnosed the problem and fixed it right away. It seems Windows automatically downloaded a driver which wasn't certified yet and it corrupted something-or-other in my computer.  At least, that's my layman's understanding of it.  Word of advice: turn off your automatic Windows updates and acknowledge everything manually.  Specifically, do not allow Windows to download or install any hardware drivers from Microsoft.  At least that was the advice Mr. Computer gave to me.  And I trust his advice.  Believe me, it really screwed up my machine. So what is new since last tim

It didn't even occur to me until just a little while ago that tomorrow is Thanksgiving.  This week hardly has a holiday feel at our house.  Beth is working Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday.  I'm working Wednesday night into Thursday morning.  We are basically tag-teaming the kids.  It is a "hi" and "bye" week.  Thursday is just another day this year. Not much to say, just wishing you all a Happy Thanksgiving and safe travels this week/weekend.  I saw earlier that a "strong chance" of snow was predicted for this weekend in my neck of the woods.  That's now been downgraded to a 10% chance. My son is starting to stir from his nap.  He's going to wake up and be mad as hell his mom isn't here.  Wish me luck.

Oh, the dreaded weekend is here.  I absolutely hate our weekend to work.  Beth and I do not see each other from 8:00 AM Friday morning until 8:00 AM Monday morning.  These three days simply suck.  I think some changes are on the horizon, but we'll see how things pan out. Wanna throw up in your mouth?  Of course you do! No, this isn't pornographic, it's just gross.  Imagine the bacon you could get off this one!  I suppose it isn't nice to make fun of fat people, but damn it, if you're gonna go out in public like this, I reserve the right to laugh at you.  It's that simple.  This comes from People of Wal-Mart , one of the funniest sites on the internet. I needed a laugh.  Now back to the regularly scheduled program.

For those looking forward to pumpkin pie on Thanksgiving... here's how they are really made: (thanks to Shelli and Travis for the e-mail!)

Back to work for another week.  Beth made Hungarian mushroom soup tonight, which is one of my favorites.  It is not low fat or low cholesterol, which is why it tastes so darn good (it is also why we don't make it too often).  Ava even ate a bowl, I think simply because I told her she wouldn't like it ("I love it!" was her reaction.  What a turd!).  The soup was made famous in our neck of the woods by a restaurant called Sibley Station which was in Pequot Lakes.  The owners of that particular establishment did not believe in the great American tradition of paying taxes, so they are no longer in business.  It's a darn shame because they concocted some outstanding recipes in that kitchen.  Oh well... stupid is as stupid does. We are still nursing Grace along.  I took her to the vet this morning for a check-up on her eye and the good news is the ulcer in her left eye is healing nicely, the bad news is she now has an ulcer in her right eye.  We noticed over the w

So I woke up this morning, looked out the window and there I saw gray and rain.  Yes! Whatever. I read today that NASA scientists have discovered a "significant" amount of water on the moon and this has "opened up a whole new chapter" in their understanding of the moon. Pardon me, but all I have to say is WHOOPTY-FRICKIN'-DO!   Okay, so why all the sudden interest in the moon again?  We went there in 1969 and returned six more times only to come the same conclusion:  this place blows this place is pretty dull.  The last time we were there was 1972.  Now the moon is really interesting again.  And it's costing us how much?  Hundreds of millions of dollars... meanwhile school programs are being cut? Maybe it's just me, but I think this is a disgraceful waste of resources, time and tax payer dollars.  Does anyone truly think colonization of the moon is feasible, other than a handful of scientists?  Hell, most of North Dakota hasn't been colon

I love this band.  Even if you don't like their music, you have to admit they go out of their way to make a difference in people's lives, and they have for 35 years. I think the best part of this CNN feature is when Gene Simmons begins to speak Hungarian to the woman... I think she was truly shocked.  (Little does she know the guy is fluent in seven languages!) I also think it's pretty cool that the wounded soldier said the Purple Hearts are fine, but he's much more honored to meet his heroes. Today is the original Armistice Day.  Thank you to all veterans as well as the men and women who are currently serving our nation.  Our prayers are with you always.  God bless you and God bless Kiss!

I survived a really crappy weekend at work.  Actually Friday and Saturday nights weren't bad, but it was the typical Sunday night "shit shift" (as we put it) that took the cake.  Of course I cannot go into any details, but allow me to say this:  the drug propofol (also called Diprivan) has gotten a really bad rap in the press lately because it torpedoed Michael Jackson, but trust me... propofol is a beautiful thing.  Enough said. However, I'm home now and I'm happy about that. So I dropped Ava off at preschool today and gritted my teeth as I headed to Wal-Mart.  I wanted to buy Bon Jovi's new album and a few other things.  Every time I go to Wal-Mart I always end up with a story to share.  This morning was no different.  When I checked out, the cashier gave me my total, so I handed her a $50 bill.  She looked at me blankly and said, "Do you got a penny?" I'm proud to say I bit my tongue, but my initial thought was to blurt out, "No I

  I don't know if grandpa ever reads my blog, but I thought this picture would make him smile!  (yes, that's a NDSU Bison shirt he's wearing) 0 0 0

I guess I'll update things here, although there's not much to say. Another gray day.  Drab.  At least it isn't raining at the moment.  It rained much of the day yesterday mixed with big, wet snowflakes dive-bombing to the ground.  Today it is just gray.  And cold.  Drab. The good news is the sun just poked out, I guess to make a token appearance just before it sets.  Better late than never. Okay, enough moping (which is different from mopping).  I think everyone at our house is finally healthy this week.  The trick is now keeping it that way... and it's only the first week of November.  Seems like it has been a long winter already and there's not even snow on the ground yet.  And it hasn't gotten anywhere near cold -- I mean bone-chilling cold, folks -- not this wussy "oh, it's 20 degrees -- it is so cold!" stuff.  I'm talking -30 degrees with a 25 mile per hour wind type of cold.  Yeah, it is coming. Didn't I just say enough mopi

I ended up not taking very many pictures on Halloween -- in fact we had to get a picture of Neil and Ava together in their costumes this morning.  Oh well, I think everyone had fun.  Here's a couple pictures for the record...   Getting beautiful... Ava the Mermaid posing by a goblin (no that's not Neil in his costume) The Mermaid and the Goldfish...

Carving pumpkins on Halloween morning!  Grace was scavenging for bits and pieces of pumpkin.  She found the "guts" rather appetizing.  Weird dog. Ava was making "pumpkin pie" while mom's artistic talents were put to work. Ava's third jack-o-lantern and Neil's first one!  (Notice Ava's burn on her top lip from "smelling" the cookies on Thursday night.  I don't think she'll do that again soon...  at least I hope not!)  I'll post some trick or treat pictures tomorrow.

Well, my daughter has me perplexed.  Since my last entry she's not had a fever and her appetite has been that of a small water buffalo.  There is no way she could have had the full-blown flu, as was my first fear.  I am trying to convince myself this was a side effect of her flu shot, but that theory doesn't hold water either.  Her temperature was far too high and it came 72 hours after the shot, which was too late. The important thing is she's feeling back to normal. Then last night, since Ava was feeling better, we baked cookies.  All was going well until she thought it was a good idea to smell the cookies on the baking sheet fresh out of the oven... No!  Stop!    It wasn't as bad as it could have been, but her top lip is sort of "trout" looking this morning.  She sort of resembles a cute version Angelina Joline (one of the ugliest women on the face of the planet, in my opinion). But the lesson was learned.  Even the most vigilant parent can't

Blech... had a bad night last night.  Ava got sick at school, puked a couple times in class... then spiked a 102 temperature. We've been "nursing" her along today, knowing there is no sense in even trying to see a doctor.  We will have to pay money to be told the following: "push the fluids and alternate Tylenol and Motrin to keep her fevers down."  Then we'll be instructed to "be sure she's urinating and when she cries be sure she has tears."  Then will come the whole "it is a viral infection and there's nothing else to do but ride it out" bit. There, I just saved time and money. It seems her flu shot was too little, too late.  Last night the adventure continued.  She threw up in bed and spiked another temp of 102.3.  I laid with her all night and kept an eagle eye on her fitful sleep.  She seemed a little better today; at least she kept some food down.  She is not running a fever at the moment, so I am going to try to lay

I haven't been the best at updating my blog lately.  I've been on Facebook, but I'm getting disgusted with it.  They are constantly changing the stupid thing and as soon as I think I've got it figured out, it has completely changed again and I have no idea what I'm doing.  It sort of reminds me of my job -- constantly changing.  I don't mind change as long as it is productive, but I get annoyed when things are being "fixed" when the ain't "broke." The weather really hasn't changed much since I last updated.  Rain.  Gray.  Cold.  C'mon, man .  So much for talking about the weather, eh? Ava got her flu shot yesterday -- or was it the day before yesterday?  I've been working all week and my days are totally mixed up.  Anyway, she did very well and got a Dairy Queen out of the deal.  I also promised her a trip to Fleet Farm (her favorite store) for a new toy horse if she was brave and got her shot, so we've got to do that

This has been the ugliest, most depressing autumn I can remember.  I usually love this time of year with the bright colors and sunny, crisp days. Not this year. Many of the leaves on the trees in our back yard are black and shriveled.  We had a hard freeze before anything had the chance to turn color.  Everything else is in drab shades of brown or dark yellow.  It's been cold and gray and cloudy and rainy (or snowy) almost every day since the beginning of October. I feel like I've stepped into a Tim Burton movie. Beth is sick, the kids have had colds and we are all getting stir-crazy from being inside so much.  Can one have cabin fever in mid-October?  It's going to be a long, long winter. At least the Vikings are winning.

This is absolutely hilarious.  It's only a minute long and will have you laughing for hours!

I hope this doesn't offend anybody, but I thought this was so funny I just howled.  This is a spoof... the Onion is a "fake news" organization made up comedy writers and they are very good and very convincing. Christian Charity Raising Money To Feed Non-Gay Famine Victims

It's just a little after 5:00 AM and I'm wide awake.  Disgusted I can't sleep tonight; I supposed I dozed for an hour or so.  Coming off a weekend of working nights, and this is one of the pitfalls of staying awake all night for multiple nights in a row.  This will be a rough day.  So let it begin. I haven't updated for a while so I might as well make my sleeplessness somewhat productive by writing for a few minutes. Last week was an adventure-filled week for me.  Last Monday night I went to the football game between the Vikings and Packers and spent the night in the Cities.  We had a great time -- I went down with Korey and Jeff Porter, who also works at the hospital.  We stayed at a "swanky" place called the Cambria Suites.  We had a room reserved at the Marriott, but they overbooked so they put us up at a different hotel.  The price was right (read: FREE) and it was a whole lot fancier than anything I would normally stay in.  That's not saying I wou

Peyton Manning, Drew Brees and Brett Favre went to heaven.  There they faced God. God asks Peyton Manning first: "What do you believe?" Peyton thinks long and hard, looks God in the eyes and say, "I believe in hard work and staying true to family and friends.  I believe in giving.  I was lucky, but always tried to do right by my fans." God can't help but to see the essential goodness in Manning and offers him a seat to His left. Then God turns to Drew Brees and says, "What do you believe?" Drew says, "I believe passion, discipline, courage and honor are the fundamentals of life. I, too, have been lucky, but win or lose, I've always tried to be a true sportsman, both on and off the playing fields ." God is greatly moved by Drew's sincere eloquence, and He offers him a seat to His right. Finally, God turns to Brett Favre : "And Brett, what do you believe?" Brett replies, "I believe you're s

My niece Lisa posted this on her Facebook page and it is just too funny not to post on my blog. The cop is trying to get the old man to blow into the breathalyzer -- and let's just say he fails miserably... The best part is the cop just loses it.

"I'm not old enough to be singing the blues... but I've worn a hole in the soles of these shoes." Here's to celebrating my big 4-0 Bon Jovi style...  a very cool amateur video of Jon Bon Jovi's surprise birthday in Philadelphia.  You'll hear Richie Sambora quip "He's turning 31 years old today."  It was actually his 46th birthday, but who's counting?  Just like me, he's not old... just older. I thought this was pretty cool (does contain some adult language... can you handle it!?)

YES! p p p p p

Off to the Metrodome to hang out, tailgate and see the Vikings play the Packers.   This should be pretty fun... ya think?!

Ava's reaction to fresh cilantro: "Oh, I don't eat grass." Smart kid. She better not smoke the shit either. = = = =

I had to scrape my windshield when I got out of work this morning. It's still September. That's not right. 9 9 9 9

8 8 8 Ava learned to whistle yesterday.   The house will never be the same again.... 6 6 6 6

It's been a while since I've updated, but there's not an awful lot happening these days.  Summer projects are done, fall is here, and it's time to start getting things ready for winter.  They say this winter is going to be cold with lots of snow.  Really?  Minnesota winter.... cold?  Snow?  Who knew? I got my flu shot today.  My arm is stiff and sore.  I've got a problem with knowingly introducing a virus into my body, but our pediatrician recommended we get vaccinated because Neil is too young for a flu shot.  If we get vaccinated, there's a lesser chance he'll be exposed.   Obviously Beth and I are at a much higher risk of bringing home germs and bugs than your average person, although we do have a little "home from work" routine involving removing scrubs and getting in the shower before any children are allowed to touch us.  We (health care workers) are supposed to get the H1N1 shot in early October and it will be available to the general publ

Forty-eight hours, 1,763 curse words, 269 head-scratchings and 122 mosquito bites later, it's done. My PVC pipe idea worked as well as it did for Pharoh Horus Aha of Egypt (First Dynasty)...  Three pieces of four foot, three inch PVC pipe can transport a 500+ pound piece of playground equipment with ease.  Physics are awesome.  The Egyptians are even awesomer. A funny story with the PVC pipe:  we went to Home Depot with the intention of buying a 10 foot section of PVC pipe and have them cut it for us (it's a little cheaper that way).  The store was nearly empty when we got there at 8:15 AM; however, there was no "customer associate" to be found in the plumbing section, where shelf upon shelf of PVC pipe lay, just waiting for my wallet.  After five minutes of standing around, somebody came along and asked us if we needed help.  After getting over the shock of actually being acknowledged, we said (rather sarcastically) "That would be great!"  So our h

It's time I update here.  A few things have been going on. First, the big news:  Ava started preschool on Sept. 15th.  We all went together to the school early Tuesday morning and Ava took it all in stride, although Mom didn't really want to leave.  Ava seemed to like it and she's looking forward to going back tomorrow (she goes Tuesdays and Thursdays). Ready for her first day of school.  She had to put on her green necklace and her duck necklace which she won while playing bingo at Farm Fest (we put them in the backpack when we got to school).  I thought it was pretty cute.  8 Early this morning, my brother-in-law, Tom, and I went to Elk River to get a playset for my two munchkins.  It is Elizabeth and Blair's old playset, and it is going to work great.  It is really big, really heavy and wasn't really made to be dismantled and transported with ease, shall we say.  We separated it in three big sections, loaded it on Tom's huge trailer, and somehow we managed

Thank you for 13 wonderful years and two beautiful children... seems like just yesterday when we said "I do" on that beautiful September afternoon. (Click the play arrow in the lower left corner) If I'd go a million miles away I'd write a letter each and every day 'Cause honey nothing can ever change this love I have for you... You make me weep, you can make me cry See me coming, and you can pass me by But honey, nothing can ever change this love I have for you... You're the apple of my eye You're cherry pie You're cake and ice cream You're sugar and spice Everything nice You're the girl of my dreams... But if you wanted to leave me and go when you got back I'd just say "Welcome home!" 'Cause honey nothing can ever change this love I have for you... Nothing can ever change this love I have for you...

Due to the start of football season, life as we know it has ceased to exist... (at least at my house)!  Skol Vikings! ~~ ~ ~

We had an enjoyable Labor Day weekend at Grandma and Grandpa Dau's over the weekend.  We decided to spend the night Saturday instead of driving an hour back and forth both Saturday and Sunday.  Ava was very excited to have a "sleep over" with her cousin Nora, and it was a very good time.  Saturday night was perfect, so we enjoyed a beautiful fire under a full moon and had plenty of cold beverages to keep us hydrated. On Sunday, I tried my hand at golf for the very first time.  I should have taken a couple lessons and spent a few hours on the driving range before actually attempting to play, but I learned on the fly and completely sucked at it.  Toward the end of the 18 holes I started getting real good hit the ball straight a couple times, but spent more time searching for golf balls in the woods than actually putting on the green. Still it was frustrating as hell fun and I wouldn't mind going again someday, because I love pissing myself off spending time outsi

Okay, you all know I love music.  I've had several people ask me what the song "The Greatest Discovery" sounds like.  It truly is a rare Elton John gem.  I altered the lyrics in my last posting to fit my life, but I'll post the song here.  I checked You Tube and evidently I'm not the only one who is deeply touched by this beautiful song.  This is a home video which I found... I have no clue who these folks are, but that doesn't really matter.  Love transcends everything.  I know you'll enjoy this... Just click the play arrow on the bottom left.

"The Greatest Discovery" Peering out of tiny eyes The grubby hands that grip the rail A strange new sound she never heard before A sound that makes little girls explore Tread so neat those little feet Amid the morning her small heart beats Large hands lift her through the air Excited eyes contain her there   Her puzzled head tipped to one side Amazement swims in those bright brown eyes Glancing down upon this thing That makes strange sounds that hum and sing In those silent happy seconds That surround the sound of this event A parent’s smile is made in moments They have made for you a friend   And all you ever learned from them (Until you grew much older) Did not compare with when they said, “This is your brand new brother.” Based on the song by Elton John